Once upon a time, there was a King who took out a second mortgage on his castle, to afford a royal wedding, for his only daughter, the fairy tale princess. He was determined to make this the finest affair his kingdom had ever known. So together with Jacques, the royal wedding coordinator, this long and arduous task had begun.

The location chosen was a fabulous old mansion, with sculpted gardens, manicured grounds, high arched ceilings, shimmering marble floors, and golden fixtures. The menu was prepared by the finest chefs in all the kingdom, The cake was a commissioned work of art, The linen was made of the finest imported flax, the floral arrangements and the amount of flowers was mind boggling, the photographer and videographer,(always booked solid for two years in advance) were two of the busiest and best around. A new royal carriage was ordered to be built. The grapes for the wedding wine were crushed by the feet of the kingdoms fairest maidens. Every detail was checked and then double checked. The king was driven to create a first class affair and money was no object.

When everything was perfect, the King thought aloud," we should probably have some music" . . . "contact the royal band." "Oh no father," cried the fairy tale Princess, "I want a DJ at my wedding." So the King summoned Jacques, the royal wedding coordinator and told him to find a DJ.

First, Jacques looked at the royal wedding budget and discovered there wasn't much left. Then Jacques began to shop around:

He contacted, DJ company #one: they sounded competent and their price was within the budget that was left over.

He contacted DJ company #two: they told Jacques what he wanted to hear, and their price was even lower than company #one.

Then Jacques contacted company #three: They asked a lot of questions: took their time, fully answering Jacques questions. They were informative, courteous and Jacques felt he had an overall pleasant conversation? But alas, their price was slightly higher than companies one & two and he did have his budget to consider.

Figuring he could save the King some money, Jacques chose Company #two because they were the least expensive. How important can entertainment be to a wedding and aren't all DJ's the same? Any authoritative wedding publication will tell you that location is the most important thing, followed by the menu, then the flowers, the, photographer, video, invitations, limo, honeymoon, ECT, ECT . . . and the entertainment is somewhere near the bottom of the list.

The big day had finally come and everything was ready for the guests to arrive. Then Jacques noticed that the DJ had not arrived yet. So he called DJ company #two and left a message on their machine.

A short while later the DJ appeared, asking for Jacques. " Hi I'm the DJ," he said, "you must be Jack." "That's Jacques," Jacques replied.

"Well hurry up and set your equipment up on the stage, the first guests will be arriving soon," Jacques said.

"Sure," said the DJ, "by the way, is there someone who can help me carry my equipment, I forgot my dolly and do you have an extension cord I can borrow?"

The first guests began to filter into the ballroom, everything was perfect. Then Jacques noticed the music hadn't yet begun. Jacques looked for the DJ, but he was nowhere to be found. A moment later the DJ appeared, tucking in his shirt tail and putting on his jacket. "Sorry, I was trying to get this cake stain out of my jacket from last week" muttered the DJ. "Well hurry up and put on some music, the guests are here," Jacques insisted!

The reception was underway and everything was truly perfect. What could possibly go wrong, Jacques thought.

The location was beautiful, the food was heavenly, the flowers were gorgeous, the wine was Devine, everything was great . . . except the DJ mispronounced the Groom's name at the couple's grand entrance. He also couldn't find the couples first dance, (though he swore he bought it). He played none of the bride and groom's requested selections, he wouldn't take requests from the guests. His announcements were unintelligible. And Jacques kept having to find him to ask him to turn the volume down. People danced . . . some. Shortly after the meal, most of the younger guests left. The word was, there was a happening party on the other side of the kingdom.

Before long, the party seemed to fizzle. There were only six maidens left for tossing the bouquet to, something seemed to be out of sync. The Fairy tale princess Bride was unhappy. This upset the King, which bothered the guests, which sent Jacques to go looking for the DJ to have him turn down the music. But everything else was fabulous.

In the end, this was a party the kingdom would never forget...but for all the wrong reasons:

The fairy tail princess lived happily ever after. The King ruled his kingdom in a benevolent manner. Jacques is now a banquet manager, at a local hotel and DJ company #two, was bought out by DJ company #one and the DJ is still doing weddings.